The thing to remember is that, at this age, children are becoming more themselves—that is, they are beginning to have a sense of who they are, what they’re good at, and what they want, as well as being able to place themselves in a social, academic, and family context. While an eight-year-old is still rather a young child, an eleven-year-old might be a secondary-school pupil starting to experience the throes of puberty.
8 - 9- They are still young enough to generally see adults as almighty authority figures, and the rules they make as solid and non-negotiable
- They’re starting to have a sense that other people have feelings and different points of view—but they might not fully be aware of it
- They like to be liked, but their friends are still mostly of their gender.
So Try:- Enrolling them in clubs or groups like Cubs or Brownies
- Focusing on lots of outdoor and physical activity (it’ll keep ‘em healthy, plus they’ve got energy to burn!)
- Playing harder board games like chess or backgammon.
10 - 11- They are starting to understand that other people have needs and feelings and different world views—they might become concerned with climate change, for example, or global poverty
- They start to realise the opposite sex are interesting, if mysterious
- They will start to understand that grown-up rules are not set in stone, and that you are actually a human being—not some giant, all-knowing figure.
So try:- To encourage reading more adult books: maybe not War and Peace, but perhaps some books aimed at the 10-13 age group – see our article Nine top books
- To talk with them about their feelings: you might find they’re turning into someone interesting and thoughtful
- Make sure they get to have some alone time for homework, and daydreaming!
Remember that every child is an individual, and that this is just very general advice. That being said, you should check with your child’s teachers and GP to make sure that they’re not experiencing any difficulties at school or in other contexts.