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Getting to know your child before indirect contact

 
Making contact

You may feel frustrated that you don’t have direct contact with your child at the moment. Don’t despair. Indirect contact can help you both to get to know each other slowly. This will help you both when and if you do have direct contact – you will already know quite a bit about each other, which will help you to get on when you meet.

Here are some things you can find out in indirect contact:

  • What they like doing at school
  • What they like doing for fun outside school
  • What they don’t like doing at school and why
  • Who their favourite teacher is
  • If they like sport – if so, which sport? Do they play? Do they support a particular team? Do they go to matches?
  • If they like music – what sort of music? What are their current favourite bands?
  • Do they play a musical instrument – which? Do they play in a band or orchestra?
  • Do they like listening to music with friends, or on their own, on a CD player or MP3 player or iPod? Is there a CD they would really like?
  • If they like games – what games? Do they have a Nintendo DS, an Xbox 360, a Wii, or a PlayStation? Or do they like board games? Or both? Which games would they like to have?
  • If they like films – which films have they watched recently? Do they watch at home or at the cinema? 

Whatever their responses, invest a bit of time researching their responses - if you try out a few movies they like or listen to some of their bands (even though you might not exactly enjoy the process) you'll have more to talk about next time. Who knows - you might even discover a new favourite yourself!

Next: Preparing for first direct contact

 

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