In some people teenage domestic discord can continue to rankle into adulthood, as we consider our parents to have been over-protective and to have failed to place enough trust in us. Becoming a parent yourself may change that: as you are often told, ‘it’s different when it’s your own child’ (which is true, though it doesn’t make empathy impossible as some parents seem to feel it does).
It won’t necessarily take until they reach adolescence to realise it – you may realise quite quickly how you’re going to feel when your baby grows up, starts getting stroppy and wants to stay out late. Having been frustrated at your parents’ inability to understand your side of things as a teenager, you may then find that your own teenage children frustratingly refuse to believe that you understand their side of things, because teenagers are annoying like that. Oh! The irony.
It’s worth remembering that, in spite of the strong impulse to protect your child, they need to be free to make their own mistakes sometimes. It’s about striking a balance – knowing when to rein them in so their mistakes aren’t too major. If you do decide that you didn’t give your parents enough credit at the time, though, they may appreciate you saying so. And it may stop them gloating when your own children put you through the wringer.